My Answer To 3 Scenarios

Scenario 1: A friend of mine has been going through some trying times. Health, work problems, and God directing, but where does she go? She is having a hard time believing that God will provide. She is struggling to believe He will provide for her good. Recently she looked at me and said something like, “You’ve wanted a good thing for over 10 years and God hasn’t given it. Why would He grant my request?”

Scenario 2: I have another friend, who every time she hears me talking of couples courting, gets a pained expression on her face. She doesn’t understand why God hasn’t provided a husband for me. It makes her sad.

Scenario 3: I know of young teens and young single gals who sort of assume that they’ll have to wait to get married until they are in their late twenties.

I’m in my late twenties…thirty is fast approaching. And I’m nowhere near the possibility (at least by what I can see) of getting married. Is that my preference? HECK NO! There’s not a day that doesn’t go by that I do not pray for God to give me a man. Some days I lack faith and I’m discouraged. But, by God’s grace that is not where I live. I have so much joy and hope. It is hard to imagine a better life than mine. Why? Because I have an all access pass to the throne of grace. I am saved from my sins. I have an intimate relationship with the Creator of the Universe. What more could one want? He satisfies. He brings peace. He sustains. He provides. He upholds me in my weakness. He comforts me when I am discouraged. He brings joy to my soul, a smile on my face, and a light in my eyes. He is my all in all.

How do you answer the three scenarios listed above? Oh, that’s easy! :D

Scenario 1: I would first resist the urge to tell my friend that, that was the dumbest line of thinking I had ever heard! :) God doesn’t work the same way in every person life. Just because He has delayed in my life doesn’t mean He will delay in hers. Only He knows what He will do. We cannot take the reigns of our life and assume (tell God) what God will do. All she (we) can assume is that He will direct and will provide. He has promised to do what is best for her. Psalm 23:6, Job 34:21

Scenario 2: I would give my friend a huge hug and thank her for her care. And then I would remind her of God’s mysterious and gracious ways. “Does not he see my ways and number all my steps?” Job 31:4 (Job 34:21, Psalm 37:23) Our wise and all-knowing Father sees the big picture. We can only see the present. But, He sees the past, present, and future. We think we know what is best for our lives. But, we really don’t. We see so dimly. He sees all and knows all. He is God. He is the Creator. He is the Sustainer of all. He is my Savior. He sees my entire life in one glance. He knows what is best. And He gives grace and strength for whatever He requires of us. Being in His will is the most glorious place to be! That is where we MUST rest.

Scenario 3: Oh how I love our youth! I wish I could be with them more than I do. (Pardon the rabbit trail…I’m done now.) What would I say to a young girl who has grown up in the church and assumes you have to wait years to get married?

“God does not give us grace for our imaginations.” –Elisabeth Elliot

Don’t borrow trouble from the future. Since all (but two) of my childhood friends are married, I think we can assume I’m not the norm. :) And even if I was, only God knows what He will do in your life. Most girls I know get married before 28. BUT, not everyone does. Both options have their own struggles and trials. God WILL provide and direct. Don’t focus on what may or may not happen. Focus on Him. Keep your heart grounded on Him. If you stay there you will be just fine. Trust Him for tomorrow and focus on faithfully following Him today. He will provide and make all things clear in His timing.

And to all three I would point them to the cross. The source of all hope rest, and peace. “He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” Romans 8:32 The cross is God’s ultimate display of His abounding love and faithfulness. The real question isn’t is God good? But, does God’s goodness ever end? And why does He give it to me? Take a good long look at the cross and all doubt will fade. He loves us more than we can comprehend. We can trust His mysterious workings because of the ultimate provision for our good.

Gaze upon the crucified Savior…all else will fade in importance.

The World’s Boringest Testimony

There were many things that struck me and many ways that I met God at NEXT. But one of the reoccurring themes was awe at my salvation story. During the conference, it regularly brought me to tears.D.A. Carson referenced that he grew up in a Christian home and was genuinely saved as a pre-teen. Kevin DeYoung & Josh Harris had similar stories and they were both saved as teens. Ricky (one of the folks that shared their testimony during the conference), also had a similar story. (I loved it when he mentioned Psalty!!!) Kevin DeYoung mentioned that we should be excited when we hear of boring testimonies. Any time God moves on a heart of stone it is a powerful story. During many of these testimonies, I was brought to tears. Not because of their stories (as powerful as they were), but the realization that my story was more boring. God’s incredible kindness in my life blew me away…

I was saved at a very, very young age. Most people will (rightly so) question a child’s conversion when it was so young. My parents did and walked me through the gospel (when I was older), making sure I understood and believed what I professed. I did! One of my earliest childhood memories was worshipping on a Sunday morning. Singing on the top of my lungs, because I loved Jesus. I cannot remember a time when I did not love my Savior and try to obey Him. It simply does not exist in my memory!

I grew up in a very loving Christian home. God graciously gave me godly and doctrinally grounded parents. Biblical truth and the doctrines of grace have been constantly preached to my soul. Life hasn’t been a bed of roses. I’ve had my own “little” rebellion. I’ve experienced many bumps and trials along the way. I’ve wrestled with gripping legalism and much besetting sin. But, God has protected me through it all! He has guarded me from so much sin and temptation. He has faithfully carried me through trials. He has taught me the difference between obedience and duty. He has shown me that His love for me will always far exceed my love for Him! And a quarter of a century later, I love Him more than ever! His love has motivated everything. He who died a violent death for my heinous sins. How could I not desperately love, obey, and follow such a Savior?

I have the world’s boringest testimony. And I am SO GRATEFUL!!! I do not deserve to have been a daughter of the King for so long. I do not deserve His care, grace, power, and protection. I have experienced the love of the Creator of the Universe for as long as I can remember. Wow! That is a gift I DO NOT deserve! Oh what grace! Halleluiah, what a Savior!!!

Who Were You Five Years Ago?

A good friend of mine, Emily, posted a very good question on her blog.

“How has God changed you in the last 5 years? How have His amazing works of grace transformed you from who you once were?”

This is a very good question, one I enjoy pondering. Looking back is always very encouraging. I can become discouraged over my lack of progress, all of the sanctification still to be worked out. The mountains of sin that still loom high in my life. But, then I look back and see God at work. What seems so “small” and “insignificant” at the time is part of a greater plan. You can’t see the whole plan until you’re on the other side (or a ways away from it, at least). Over the past five years (six, really) God has been working on one area. I don’t think I’ve realized it, but most of the “sins” that I have been trying to put to death in one way or another have had a common root…the fear of man. This sin has taken countless forms of the years. And as God begins to work on the heart, things on the outside begin to change.  As I sit at my desk, I am amazed. As I think back to how I looked and acted 5 years ago and how I am now, I’m floored. I’m not taken with myself (well, in appearance at least :)!). And frankly, how I dressed, looked, and acted didn’t matter that much to me. I honestly thought I was pretty plain and boring. Why care? (VERY wrong attitude, btw!) But, God began to reveal to me that the real problem was that I cared too much. I was so consumed with what people thought of me, that I felt I could never measure up…so why try? Instead of enjoying being the person God created me to be. Instead of enjoying the friends and family He had placed in my life. I spent my time evaluating what they thought (what I perceived they thought) and how I didn’t measure up.

Now obviously, that is the VERY short explanation. And it’s probably not a great explanation at that. But, hopefully you understand. It’s not about what I look like, but does what I wear glorify God. It’s not about how I act, but does the way I am acting draw people to the Savior? Others opinions (even if they’re just perceived) don’t dictate (or in my case make me give up) what I wear or how I act. One of my favorite quotes is, “Modesty is ANYTHING that draws undue attention to oneself.” So, by dressing like a frump, I was just as “immodest” as the average high school cheer leader in public school. I’m not advocating wearing Gap and American Eagle. I don’t want to be a model…ha! absolutely not! I’ll never be Miss America (no thanks). I just want people to look at me and smell the sweet aroma of the gospel. I want nothing to stand in the way (frumpy or skimpy or too loud or too quiet) of the Savior. His reputation is what I want to matter the most.

That was not my outlook 5 years ago. It’s how I am beginning to think now. That is an amazing work of grace! I sadly (read much sarcasm in that remark!) could not find the scary pictures of me. I did find one from a Celebration conference in ‘04. :)

Hahaha…

  I am truly amazed at God’s work in my life. The peace, joy, and rest that I now experience is unlike any other. I never would have thought that by working on “one” sin, it would produce so much fruit. He truly knows best. I’m so grateful for His power (Ro. 1:16) to continue (‘cause I have a LONG way to go) what He has begun! Thanks Em, for the reminder. Wow, God has done a lot in 5 years! I have been transformed on the inside and out by His amazing grace!!!

Enough

If asked what was the main lesson I’ve learned from this extended period of singleness; I would answer the gospel. Duh! You might say. Cop-out, you might think. But, that would be a sincere answer. I’m nearing 30 and no guy is in sight. I’m a far cry from the 18yr. old bride I had hoped to be. Ten years late and I’m still single. It looks like I’m doomed to the fate of an old maid. (This last statement is a joke, btw!)

BUT that, my friend, is not the end of the story. THERE IS HOPE!!! And it’s not a knight in shining armor. My hope lies in a Man. One who died for my rebellious sin towards God. There is only one thing that I need…salvation from the wrath of God. A man is simply a gift. He is not lasting, only God is. He cannot satisfy, God satisfies my every desire with Himself. A man will disappoint and sin against me. God is faithful and perfectly holy. The cross proves God’s 100%, never-ending, faithful, constant love towards me. If the Creator of the Universe loved me enough to kill His Son for me. If He loved me so much that He secured my eternal destiny at the expense of His Son. Then I can trust Him with my life. It doesn’t matter where the road leads. It doesn’t matter if the road is flat or an uphill trek. I’m being led by the Creator of the Universe and the Redeemer of my Soul. How awesome is that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can it get any better…I don’t think so. Does that mean that I don’t care if I get married? Heck no! There’s nothing I want more. But, my fulfillment is not found in my marital status. Marriage is not my hope. Christ is my hope. He is the fulfillment of all my desires. He is enough (and yes, there are days I have remind myself of this!).

 

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You are my supply
My breath of life
And still more awesome than I know
You are my reward
worth living for
And still more awesome than I know

All of You is more than enough for all of me
For every thirst and every need
You satisfy me with Your love
And all I have in You is more than enough

You’re my sacrifice
Of greatest price
And still more awesome than I know
You’re the coming King
You are everything
And still more awesome than I know

More than all I want
More than all I need
You are more than enough for me
More than all I know
More than all I can say
You are more than enough for me

© SIX STEPS MUSIC© WORSHIPTOGETHER.COM SONGS. Christ Tomlin. All Rights Reserved.

My Salvation Story

Glorious God,

I bless thee that I know thee.

I once lived in the world, but was ignorant of its Creator,

was partaker of thy providences, but knew not the Provider,

was blind while enjoying the sunlight,

was deaf to all things spiritual, with voices all around me,

understood many things, but had no knowledge of they ways,

saw the world, but did not see Jesus only.

O happy day, when in thy loves sovereignty

thou didst look on me, and call me by grace.

Then did the dead heart begin to beat,

the darkened eye glimmer with light,

the dull ear catch thy echo,

and I turned to thee and found thee,

a God ready to hear, willing to save.

- Valley of Vision

God saved me from a life of drugs, alcohol, and sex at a very young age. My salvation story isn’t dramatic, in one sense. I wasn’t snatched form a life of habitual and “bad” sin. I was snatched as a girl and kept from those sins. And yet I was snatched and redeemed from my sin. Because, you see, a bad attitude sent Christ to the cross just as much as adultery or murder. I sit here trying to remember a day before I was saved and I cannot. I cannot remember a day in my life that I did not love my Savior. Of course that day exists, but I have no memory of it. This blows me away. It leaves me in awe. That God would save me. That He would soften my heart towards Him at sucha a young age. That He would purposefully protect me from so many things. And even when my rebellious heart reared against Him; He kept me and protected me. When I purposefully and willfully (as a traitorous child of the King) sinned and tried to do my own thing, He would only le me go so far. And when He decreased, He pulled me back to Him. I cannot remember a time He has not sovereignly lead and orchestrated my life. How amazing is that? The almighty Creator, Lord of the Universe, King of kings; He lovingly leads, protects, guides, and gives grace…to me! I don’t deserve it. There's nothing good or desirable in me. He could have left me to myself for years. I could be in such different circumstances. Yet, in His great mercy, God plucked me as a little girl! He set a song in my heart and cleansed my wicked heart. He put a desire for Himself within me. He stirred (and continues to stir) my heart towards Him. What amazing grace to such a an undeserving sinner!!!