5.29.2008

God's Sense of Humor Pt. 1

Ok, I'm sitting here laughing. After being a Christian for 24 years, you'd think I would learn to buckle in when I ask questions of God. But, no, I have to ask Him to work and then I don't expect great things. I'm just a complete retard! Here's what I asked before I left for NA:

NA Prayer: I want to enjoy my Savior and my friends. I want to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and get out of the conference what He wants me to get out of it. I’m very good at setting boundaries for how God can work in my life. I don’t always like it when He works in ways other than I would expect or want. My goal for NA is to enjoy Him, enjoy my friends, and be willing and flexible in excepting whatever He has. I want to be able to say “Whatever my God ordains is right!” with complete joy and trust. I want to just have so much fun enjoying Him this conference.

Hahaha! What I find most humorous is that what I was really focusing on (enjoying God) happened, but it wasn't God's theme for the conference. "...be willing and flexible in excepting whatever He has. I want to be able to say 'Whatever my God ordains is right!' with complete joy and trust." I wasn't expecting to live in a tornado all weekend. I'm really not sure where to start. I guess at the beginning, a very good place to start (name that movie!)...

Saturday: I started the conference feeling so weak. I was so tired I felt sick. I was so tired, I really didn't want to go to the conference, I wasn't looking forward to it. All I wanted to do was check in to the hotel and sleep for hours. That was a very frustrating feeling. I LOVE NA! Why wasn't I excited? There were also some other things that I was slightly nervous about and really just didn't want to deal with. So, we're driving, but getting close to the Galt House. I prayed (very good thing to do). I asked the Lord to please give me energy. I needed supernatural strength because I felt like I was going to fall over. Within 5 minutes I felt better! Wow, now that's a way to start a conference. We finally got to the Galt House and there was an incredibly long line. Being Matt's assistant (and since I did the reservations) I got to wait in the line. Thanks to Matt McCarnan for coming and taking all my junk. It was more than I could hold and it was getting super heavy!!! We checked in and got the 10 rooms squared away and handed out to my dear friends. We got in our rooms around 5:00pm. Aaahhh!!! For anyone that's been to NA with me, ya know the time (5pm) alone was temptation to stress and not trusting God. I like to sit in the front row. I've sat in the front at church most of my life. I'm used to it and I concentrate better (less distractions, well except for the camera man and his camera in your face that is). When you're at a conference with 3,500 people, I would like to be on at least one of the first 10 rows. But, for that to happen, you have to get to the doors super early. The conference started at 7:30pm. That means the doors opened at 7pm, that means I was at the doors at 6pm. I had an hour to change, get some much needed caffeine, and get to the Convention Center. There was no way I was gonna be able to organize all my stuff or go to CVS for groceries. Way to start the conference. Having to trust God when my plans really weren't going how I wanted them to (little did I know that was gonna be the ENTIRE conference). So, Wendy and I went and got Starbucks (yay! for the Marriott Starbucks and their short lines!!!). Then we went up and sat. Great time for biblical fellowship and seeing old friends. I talked to Wendy, Creed, and Kristen for a little while and then an old friend of mine happened to walk up. We talked 'till they opened the doors. We had a lot of catch up, since we hadn't talked since last summer. The doors opened, but I didn't have to rush in a get a seat, since I had taken Wendy in and already gotten a seat!!!!!!! A wonderful kindness of God!

Worship was great, but not as enjoyable as it has been in the past. I was really distracted and having a hard time focusing on God and not on other circumstances that had happened in the past couple of minutes before worship. I was really frustrated. This wasn't how the conference was supposed to be! I had really, really, really been looking forward to meeting God in worship. It's probably my favorite part of NA. This wasn't what I wanted. :-) Sounds like God, huh? Yep! So, as I stood there trying to worship, the Holy Spirit kindly reminded me that whatever happens is God's will. That I do need to focus and not let my thoughts run astray, but not to stress out...this distraction didn't catch Him off guard. He was aware this was going to happen. It was in His plan. Chill out, take a deep breath, enjoy Him, watch Him provide in my weakness. Then Josh gets up and preaches an out of the park message. Wow! I really don't remember much except for one point he made. The Holy Spirit was really in my face reminding me of recent posts and journal entries I'd made. Josh asked if we had an iTunes mentality to Scripture. Did we pick and choose what we wanted to believe? Did we ignore parts of Scripture? Did we choose not to believe certain things in the Bible. Ouch! I was specifically thinking about all my struggles with expecting blessing and provision from God. The Holy Spirit was so in my face convicting me of my sin and how that's exactly what I have been doing (picking and choosing parts of Scripture). Then we went to our Community Groups. After that I went back to the Galt House and crashed. I think I was in bed by 1am or 1:30am. Not bad for New Attitude...

2 comments:

Emily said...

um... sound of music.

i win.

i guessed correctly and it was a movie that came out long before 2004! yippee!

YellerDaisies said...

wow...wonders never cease...